I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Its about making memories worth repressing
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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