We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize