do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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