Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
