ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
it was like having sex with a tree stump
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He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
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I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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