YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Please, let me fuck your mom
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize