You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
