Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
