I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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