do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
