He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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