lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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