I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
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It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
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Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
ok first of all what the fuck
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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