You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize