I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
