Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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