At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
