he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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