Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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