I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
