I molested 6 butterflies tonight
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Are we still banned from the library?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
