Already got asked if we're dating
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
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