So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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