he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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