was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize