I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
