i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
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