thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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