she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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