Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize