Sponge bath it is.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
