I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
