why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Randomize