I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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