the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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