wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize