"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
