this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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