Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
