Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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