I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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