hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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