dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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