I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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