I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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