In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Randomize
