Where did you get a picture of my penis
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
