so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize