Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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