Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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